Hit with a Hammer
One of the Neighbors just had 3 guys in balaclavas break into their house and smash one of them up with a hammer over the head.
The victim claimed they didn’t know who they were and think they have the wrong house *cough* Bullshit *cough*.
None the less, we are going to start taking precautionary measures.
- Ducktape a machete to the back of the front door
- Fill a vat of boiling water to the bathroom window that will tip out when someone rings the doorbell.
- Tape rockets to our backs so we can shoot out through the roof if they come back
- Construct a large hadron collider in each room that is rigged to hopefully create a black hole large enough to engulf the house.
- Use Homers ‘Everything is OK alarm’
- Never answer the front door or leave the house.
- Take suicide pills now as a precautionary measure.
None of my ‘enemies’ would hit the wrong guy in the head with a hammer. I have more faith in you than that. Also I know that you’re all too smart to hit someone in the head with a hammer anyway because that’s a fucking stupid thing to do. I ignore stupid people, I don’t make enemies of them. Mainly because they will hit the guy who lives next to you in the head with a hammer and I don’t wish that upon anyone.
Some of the other guys are sketching out. They all need to calm the fuck down and realize people don’t get hit in the head for nothing and they defiantly don’t tell the police who hit them in the head or why they would do it, because if it’s serious, they’ll come back if you snitch.
